The Nether Regions

The blog that slips an affectionate hand between the thighs of the regional media

Sick and tyred

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As dozens of vehicles career off Canvey Island’s roads as a result of loose tyres, all the locals can do is moan about  the ruddy mess.

Southend Echo, 24 February 2011 (story):

Just who is the phantom tyre dumper?

A COUNCIL has been urged to use spy powers to help find the now notorious Canvey tyre dumper.

Another 25 tyres have been dumped on the island, this time in Haven Road and near the entrance to a caravan park.

More than 1,000 tyres have been dumped over a series of nights since mid-December, but so far the police and council have failed to catch the culprit.

Jane King, Canvey Island Independent Party councillor for Canvey West, believes Castle Point Council should use any available law to find the person responsible.

“Something must be done, because Canvey shouldn’t be a dumping ground. These tyres are costing the tax payer a fortune to get rid of.”

Oh look, here comes the obligatory single-issue local politican, no doubt hoping to make a name for themselves where others fear to tread.

Oh, and look, here’s the obligatory concerned local resident who only gets worked up about the odd bit of litter despite all of the more pressing evils in society:

Elizabeth Swann spotted the latest pile of tyres when she left her home in Haven Road on Monday morning.

She said: “I saw all these tyres on the side of the road, and thought, ‘Oh no, not again’.

“We had the same thing here about a fortnight ago, although that time they left them all scattered down the road. This time they’d been left in a neater pile.”

Ah, finally, these cold hearted and conniving tyre-dumping bastards have found it in their hearts to leave their rubbery deposits in a neat pile. Just goes to show that even fly-tippers have a conscience.

Thanks to Roddy Campbell for leaving this mess of a story in a neat pile in my Inbox.

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Written by Paddy

March 8, 2011 at 12:33 pm

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