The Nether Regions

The blog that slips an affectionate hand between the thighs of the regional media

Oche the noo

with 2 comments

This is why you shouldn’t throw darts when you’re battered on booze.

Dunfermline Press, 22 April 2010 (story):

Woman barred from Dunfermline pub for poor dart throw

A DODGY dart throw that burst a radiator led to a woman being BARRED from her local.

Pub regular Lorna McGrath (25) caused damage worth £175 accidentally after “messing about” in a late-night game of arrows with staff at the Elizabethan, Halbeath Road, Dunfermline.

Despite offering to stump up for the damage, the Townhill travel agent has been told she is not allowed back.

Furious Lorna, of Main Street, started playing darts as she waited for her flatmate to finish her shift last month.

An emergency plumber had to be called out at 3.30am when her long-range dart throw pierced a heater underneath the board.

She said, “It’s a stupid place to have a dartboard.

“I’ve held up my hands and said I wasn’t playing properly and was messing about but it was a complete accident.

“Every single person I have spoken to thinks this is absolutely ridiculous,” she said.

“The regional manager said it was my disrespect towards the pub that got me barred but I could not respect that pub more.

“But it’s safe to say I will not be entering any tournaments,” added Lorna.

She ‘could not respect that pub more’, but it’s doubtful the pub owners will appreciate news coverage which appears to expose the fact they regularly have lock-ins until 3.30am, in breach of licensing laws. A surefire act of revenge on Lorna’s part.

Thank you to Ian McColville.


Written by Paddy

September 20, 2010 at 2:04 pm

2 Responses

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  1. The Townhill Travel Agent. Good darts name. It’s definitely up there with The Power, One Dart and Darf Maple.


    September 20, 2010 at 8:36 pm

  2. I think “Furious Lorna” is a pretty good title to go by, too…


    September 21, 2010 at 3:32 am

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